Imagine being free all the time. Then suddenly as you begin to grow and mature you are trapped in the dark, hidden away, suffocated and only fully released at night. As you continue to grow you may be forced into ridiculously small spaces, or constantly pushed around. That is the tragic life of a boob.
imagine if your school got a new exchange student and you looked up at it was your favorite character
“but you died…”
"but you’re 35…"
"but you’re fictional…"
"but… but you’re over 900 years old.."
MAKING JOKES ABOUT HOW “ITS WEIRD TO SEE ME OUT OF MY ROOM FOR ONCE” DOES NOT MAKE ME WANT TO LEAVE MY ROOM MORE IT MAKES ME WANT TO LOCK MY DOOR AND NEVER LEAVE AGAIN I DON’T KNOW WHY THAT’S SUCH A HARD CONCEPT
This also applies to “WOW SHE’S CLEANING!” and anything else like that do not fucking do that.
THE SUN IS ON FIRE, I REPEAT, THE SUN IS ON FIRE.
THIS IS AN EMERGENCY, THE EARTH IS SPINNING GUYS, IT’S FUCKING SPINNING!!
A MYSTERIOUS GAS HAS SETTLED ALL THROUGHOUT EARTH AND WE ARE CURRENTLY BREATHING IT IN
this site. seriously.
seriously guys? THE SKY IS PEEING ON ME. AND PEOPLE ARE DANCING IN IT
The people freaking out about this are ridiculous.
LIKE I’M PRETTY SURE IF THERE’S ONE PERSON ON THE GODDAMN PLANET YOU CAN TRUST WITH A CHILD ON A SKATEBOARD, IT’S FUCKING TONY HAWK
IT’S ALSO JUST ADORABLE OKAY
okay okay storytime
when I was like 6 and my bro was 4 we were in some bar and my parents were fucking sick of us so they went and had a couple drinks while we ran around and messed with the shuffleboard table. So this random guy, seeing my parents fucking stressed out of their minds spends an hour and a half teaching us how to play shuffleboard and playing with us. So my parents are thanking him later and recognize him from the cover of some magazine and
Tony Hawk taught me and my brother to play shuffleboard
and my parents bought him a drink
“THE BUBBLE WRAP ROOM TO PUT RORY IN WHEN HE SLEEPS SO HE WON’T DIE AT NIGHT.”
Bringing this back to my blog cause it’s perfect.
AN ENTIRE SQUARE MILE OF BUNK BEDS
drugs in case rose comes back though
WHERE THE HELL IS THE LIBRARY?!
Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”
Why does this not have any notes?
lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”
“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”
“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”
Yesterday my mom posted a picture on Facebook of my 5 year old brother Sam wearing a pair of shoes he picked out for his first day of preschool.
She explained to him in the store that they were really made for girls. Sam then told her that he didn’t care and that “ninjas can wear pink shoes too.”
Sam went to preschool and got several compliments on his new shoes. Not one kid said anything negative toward him about it.
However, my mom received about 20 comments on the photo from various family members saying how “wrong” it is and how “things like this will affect him socially” and, put most eloquently by my great aunt, “that shit will turn him gay.”
My mom then deleted the photo and told Sam that he can wear whatever he wants to preschool, that it’s his decision. If he wants to wear pink shoes, he can wear pink shoes.
Sam then explained to her that he didn’t like them because they were pink, he liked them because they were “made out of zebras” and zebras are his favorite animal :)
What does it say about society when a group of adults could stand to take a lesson in humanity from a class of preschoolers?Words cannot express how happy this makes me.
Omg forever reblog